WWRD!? What would rocky do.

Forever saying that lately.
 God i just wish my aunt was here to talk to.

I've I've lost my mind, and i honestly don't even know what to think anymore.

I've always been the girl who thought she could never be loved, but now she is loved she's very very loved... But just being loved isn't really enough anymore... I'm not being treated as well as i should but then again things might be different if we were older and if he knew how i was feeling... I can never make the words come out right... I want to be spoiled, I'M A MOTHERFUCKING PRINCESS. and sometimes i just don't think he gets just how much i need to be treated better than what i think i deserve... i deserve the world, but i'd never wish or ask for it... and maybe just maybe that's the problem here... I don't know my worth, i need someone to show me that i'm worth it.. and that i deserve flowers and sweet texts And long drives to nowhere... i just i don't want to leave, i really don't i want to stay and prove to myself and to him that i'm worth more than what he gives... God i sound so stupid right now... Ugh i hate myself for getting like this... AGAIN.... he's a teenage boy... WHAT DO I EXPECT flowers and presents and long car rides.....? because obviously right now he just can't give me those things.... But that doesn't mean he won't someday... Someday oh someday.... I'm saying that alot lately.. someday things will change, someday things will be different someday i'll be shown that i'm worth it and i'll know that there's more than just love and feelings in this relationship but honestly i don't think i can wait for this "someday" i'm impatient... I always have been... But i've stood by him and waited anyway... I just don't know how long i can hold on to the thoughts of tomorrow instead of grabbing life by the balls and living for today... And now thing's get a little complicated and hard to grasp.... Someone new has popped up into my life just yesterday well two days ago if you want to get technical... We stayed awake with each other talking all night... And then, oh then he came to see me... SAY WHAT!!!!?.... Is this real life, because well it sure as hell doesn't feel like it anymore.. which is odd because i honestly haven't felt this alive in a really REALLY long time... Omfg i thought i was gonna have a heart attack when he showed up and my parents were both still sleeping... and as my mom said "there's other fish in the sea"  But those fish in the sea don't matter to me as much as my nemo does... But then again  nemo doesn't stay up all night just to talk to me or drive an hour to come see me.... Nor can i stay in bed all day with nemo without him nagging me to entertain him or do something I JUST WANNA CUDDLE AND TALK DAMNIT. is that to much to ask for...? Nemo is starting to become more and more just Emo... wow that was mean but in the end kind of true.. We shall see what happens.... Wish me luck. Oh that's right nobody reads this.. HAhaha. Still universe wish me luck. Why do good girls, fall for bad guys!!? Because honestly neither of these guys are better for me than the other.. Ugh i can't help but love how they make me feel though... I've been dead for far to long... IT'S TIME TO WAKE UP AND LIVE YOLO BITCHES... the yolo part was a joke btw. good god just no.